WELCOME TO THE


You've never had more reason to love your computer. Week 17 | April 2000

[latest photographs]
Galway 2000: Martin admires Pam's latest assets.

Pam's assets are well admired.
L-R: Dara, Pam, Martin, Matt. Click here for more Galway photos and the review.

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THE ARCHIVES
Listed menu: Easy to navigate.

STATEMENT OF THE WEEK:
"Phil" (on an announcement on the train):
"'Are there any passengers on the train that aren't travelling?' Is that some sort of philosophical question?"

WORD OF THE WEEK:
Aye
-I am, aye, for real.

DROP US AN E:
waltzer@excite.com

AUDIOFIND

GET MP3:



   

[news]

The Galway Experience!

Drinking on trains, laughing at televisions, breaking bones, flirting, winning prizes, losing quizzes, learning to smoke, breakfast in bed and forgetting names. Galway 2000 was a potent mix of business and pleasure.

Upon checking in and getting settled I went to a pub on Eyre Square with Laura, Phil and Jody. That was interesting as Laura's brother, Gary was working behind the bar and we were telling jokes and having a good laugh to ease us into the nerve-wracking table quiz that was to follow...
>>More

alanwall.com

Everyone is going mad these days buying domain names. Is your name still available? I bought mine the other day from Register.com. Now no one will buy my name when I am famous like a certain politician recently. I also get any email address I want! I could have waltzer@alanwall.com, or alan@alanwall.com. Whatever.
Registering with this crowd only cost IR£50 for two years. That's 50p a week! That doesn't include hosting mind you, so you can't put up a web site. But the point is no-one else will either. There is a deal with these guys to redirect your traffic to another website, so I could have alanwall.com redirected to waltzer.net, or my free pages on eircom.net. That costs about IR£40 a year I believe. I'll probably set up a page off my site like www.waltzer.net/alanwall for corporate stuff like a portfolio, and have alanwall.com redirected to it.
Go to www.alanwall.com to see if your name is available. (There is a page belonging to register.com there). If you can't get your dot.com, you might still get the dot.net or some other extension. All the info is there. Knock yourself out!

Miss Last Weeks Episode?

If you were in Galway last weekend and didn't come to work since, then you missed last week's episode! It wasn't a bad one either. Check it out, it's in the archives.

The Share Crash

There are very few of you who aren't feeling the brunt of the recent share crash. Nearly everyone I know has shares in some technology company or another, and at the moment, Nasdaq technology shares are falling dramatically. This is due to a mixture of Microsoft being broken up, and the media talking the shares into a crash. Many headlines around the world professed the coming of a burst to the "balooning" value of technology companies.

There are few technology companies and hardly any Internet companies that are making a profit. Let me give you some advice, if I may: If you are holding shares of an Internet company that is making a profit and the shares are falling, hold on to those shares. The big investors who have the power to drive the markets will soon put their money into large, money making Internet companies. They might allocate a hefty chunk of their budget to a few good companies now that the ones not making a profit are unreliable. Stick it out and you will be rewarded.

As for the crash, whether that was for the best is yet to be seen.

   

[featured site]

[c46.com]

Whassup? Do you miss your Commodore? I do! And now thanks to passionate geeks, complete disrespect for intellectual property and the power of the Net, you can get your computer to act like a Commodore 64. That's right! Play all your old favourites: Out Run, Flimbo's Quest, Impossible Mission and Paperboy. All you need to do is get a Commodore emulator. You can get the CCS64 emulator (follow the link from the C64 website) which is just a programme that makes your PC act like a Commodore 64. Once you have that, you can start gettig the games. That is where c64.com comes in. They have a full search engine which is very easy to use, or you can go to all the games that start with, say, "W" by ckicking on the "W" box above the search box.

Retro gaming has become popular recently as more and more 3D action adventure games are being produced, often looking fabulous, but with no real addictive gameplay. The old-school game developers hadn't much to work with as far as video memory or even colours are concerned, so they chanelled thier energy into creating highly playable and addictive games.

Remember you used to always wish you had a certain game/ I always wanted Creatures. I was looking for it for years! And remember recording all your friends games? You'd have a 90 minute tape full of games listed with the counter position so you could fast forward to them quickly! Wasn't it always the best games didn't work? Well now you can get those longed-for games easily. On a 56k modem they take about three minutes to download. You will have to do this from home, though. I don't think Websense will let you through if you are at work.

[Flimbo]

    [that wrecks me buzz]

TABLOIDS

Goddamn it, I hate those Tabloids. How can anyone read them? I mean you pick it up and it's just full of crap. For a start, the quality of writing and design is appalling. They must get the cheapest graphic designers to do the layout and special ads. And as for the writing- it is painful to read. They just throw anything together to make a story.

Secondly, nearly the entire content of these brutal papers is made up of scandal and celebrity stories. No culture, arts, business, politics (except the sordid details) or technology. Just crap like horoscopes, Lotto numbers, religious scandal and Hollywood gossip. They dig up shit on any auld bit of a story to fill space. And they pretend that everything they tell you is true! I don't mind comedy writing like The Onion and the National Enquirer that are obviously having a laugh and you know it. The Tabloids are spinning these half-truths that might be destructive in the minds of people who are easily led.

Next reason is that they use misleading photos.

Misleading Heading Illustration

See my example above. At first glance you would think the story is about that pretty girl in the picture, and you are shocked that someone as young and innocent looking as her would ever be involved in fraud. Well look closer: If you mouse over the image you will see that you have been TRICKED! Ha ha! Yes, there are no less than two stories on the page. One story is only a few lines about some model, while the big story has nothing to do with her (even though it's heading is over her). If you are not wide you will read about three paragraphs before you realise you have been conned. That's always a bad buzz.

Captions

Another thing that wrecks me buzz about these excuses for papers are those underlined captions in the middle of the story that you read but they don't give you anything but a headache.

Finally, there are the stupid captions under the photos. Always hateful, the caption takes the form of an eye-catching word, followed by a colon and some information. Every time! There could be a picture of Waltzer with some of his favourite girls around, and underneath there would be a caption like
GANGSTER: Waltzer was addicted to £400 hookers or something completely ridiculous like that.

So far a healthier lifestyle, don't buy Tabloid newspapers. They are like the Junior Cert: Pure headache, and not worth the paper they're written on.

Now that wrecks me buzz.

© 2000 Alan Wall