WaltzerExperience :w:

More crazy adventures with The Waltzer

permanent url:/home207.htm | week 207 | 12 February 2002
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Guinness' Source party

Georgeous girl in orange dress shouts into the lift.


Funky girls Guy biting finger Young man
Lights over city Happy red head Paranoid Alan
Foxy girls Tasty orange flavoured girl. Mairead, Brian
Brian and waitress Two guys in lift Blonde fox from Slappers
Mop top hair shop Two girls Payment in Euro's only at bar
Finger girl People's republic of Cork Good looking young one


Tony S. over the phone and with a serious tone: No, "F" for "Feck Off."

Sim having difficulty explaining to parents what she does
New girl on canteen till much happier, for now...
Designer walks home after wasting money on hot dogs, onion rings



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The Waltzer Experience is a Tuesday weekly underground culture magazine for the Clonskeagh office. Waltzer welcomes submissions to waltzer@waltzer.net.
Alan Wall is a graphic designer who's interested in photography, web design, Dublin culture and writing.

 Main News

Waltzer.net site plagiarized

PhoneyThey say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, but outright plagiarism is going a bit far.

A group of telecoms industry workers have blatantly ripped off the Waltzer's web site. The Phoney, a satirical site about the office of telecom company Soft-ex, is not only based on Waltzer.net but they have stolen the HTML template.

Around the office the news that these culprits had created a site with the Waltzer template spread like wildfire. The fact that they had included everything this site has, even leaving it all in the same place, has astonished Waltzer.net viewers. They even copied one of my WorkStats and modified it. Not only that, but they used one of my images of our Christmas party, left loads of my redundant code on the source, said "bangtastic," and had the cheek to include a copyright notice on the bottom!

I am in discussion with my legal advisors as to what to do about this blatant plagiarism, so expect to see more on this story as time goes by.

Sarah has baby girl

Artist's impression of baby Rebecca
Sarah Hipwell, aka "Mama," has had a new baby girl, Rebecca. The baby was born on the night of the 7th and weighed 7lbs. What's that in euro now? Congratulations to Sarah from all at Waltzer Group.

Monsters Inc. on Scratch

Monsters Inc.Incredibly, someone has put the latest Disney movie, Monsters Inc., on Scratch. This movie is still being shown in cinemas and is not due out on video/DVD for a few months. The movie, which is in a folder called "elbow," is split across a 457MB and a 432MB file. It has a decent screen size of 355x182 so is quite viewable.



Jody in two upcoming plays
In an exclusive interview with Waltzer.net, actor Jody Fitzpatrick tells us about the two plays he's working on.

Jub Jub:w: What character do you play in each play?

Jody: The first play I'm in, staged by Dalkey Players, is called "By the Bog of Cats". It is a very dark play set in the Irish midlands and it is written by Marina Carr. I play Carthage, the husband of an itinerant called Hester who is going through something of an emotional breakdown.

The other play I'm in, staged by Martello Productions in Dun Laoghaire, is John B. Keane's "The Field". I play Tadhg who is a very different character to that in the screen version. In the play Tadhg is as sinister and evil as the Bull himself and is way too cute to endure the tragic death he suffered in the movie .

:w: Previously you played an abusive husband which proved challenging in a violent scene. Is there any scene that you are worried about or has proven difficult in the upcoming plays?

Jody: There is in fact in both plays. In "By the Bog of Cats" I have to engage in a lot heavy emotional scenes and it's fierce difficult to inject a lot of reality into them. I have to perform the violent fight scene in "The Field" and this was tricky to choreograph, what with the punches to the kidneys and the boots to the head. It'd be fecking boring though if you didn't have these things to puzzle over!

:w: How long have you been rehearsing these plays? Is it difficult working on two at a time?

Jody: I have been rehearsing both plays for over a month at this stage. Doing one play takes up a lot of your free time, doing two laves you with no free time at all. I don't mind though as I've got two good roles to play. Thankfully, I've had no difficulty yet in learning lines for both plays but 'tis still early days. I'm really nervous about the play with Dalkey Players though for a couple of reasons. First of all it's going on for six nights. Secondly because it's my first play with them and they have the reputation for being one of the best amateur drama groups in the country. Their last production starring the House's own Alan Nuzum came second in the All Ireland One Act Final in Athlone and swept the boards in the recent one act festival in Bray, so I won't get away too easily with my usual shoddy standard of performance!

:w: Where are the plays on and what are the dates?

Jody: "By the Bog of Cats" runs from March 7-11 in the Town Hall, Dalkey. "The Field" runs for three nights at the end of March at a venue and date that has yet to be decided and then we will perform it at the Gaiety Theatre, Douglas during Easter Week as part of the Isle of Mann International Drama Festival.

 That Wrecks Me Buzz

The most paranoid and cocky bloke ever

AlanFriday night: After an hour of Keep It Clear, a deadly Tetris-type game, I set out on the walk to Ranelagh. John Owens was having a birthday party in McSorley's so I had a couple of drinks with the lads while waiting for Brian to arrive.

Brian and I were about to go to an artist's exhibition launch in Guinness' Source bar. Free drink and a change of scene are always welcome. Once we got our tickets at WaltzerLounge we made the short walk to Guinness Storehouse.

After flashing our tickets to the bouncers, we ascended the stairs, then a lift, and found ourselves in the Source Bar, with hundreds of funky looking people around, everyone happily drinking pints of Guinness. The atmosphere was excellent, from people chatting to you at the bar, to the friendly bar staff. We were ages getting served but soon realised that every five minutes this girl would come out of this magic door with a tray of six pints. All we had to do was stand around and wait. And so we got suitably merry trying to keep up with our magic girl.

At this stage we had bumped into Caoimhe, Niamh, and some of Isobel's friends. When the bar closed and the drink ran dry we found a seat with a magnificent view of Town. I was chatting to Brian about it as I looked out the window, and when I turned to him, he was at the next table chatting to this beautiful young one (pictured). After a while I joined them as her friend was looking lonely and I was at a loose end looking out the window myself. Soon they had to go and so did we.

There were loads of funky looking people around and I wanted to photograph them so I came up with a cunning ploy. I told people I was doing an article on Retro Hair Styling and would they mind if I photographed them. Everyone obliged!

The most paranoid and cocky bloke ever.

Outside we were asking around if there were any parties going on. One guy said there was but we'd have to tell him who we are. No problem, we told him, but he wouldn't believe it. He wanted to see my ID! I eventually showed it to him to shut him up and he insisted that it was fake! Strangely he asked me if I work for The Slate (a college-produced, yuppie-bashing sarcastic magazine). I told him I didn't, but I did write one article for The Evil Gerald, (which was edited beyond recognition, and I disowned it). He wouldn't believe I didn't work for The Slate and refused to believe anything else I said. This guy was so annoying. He kept using fake names when anyone spoke to him, but I believe his name was Alan and his friend who was also at the same buzz I'll call Rob.

So Brian and I started talking to some of the girls that were with him, Brian was getting on particularly well with one, and as I stared trying to make conversation with another one, this guy Alan started at me again. I don't know why he was so interested in me when he was acting so cocky and paranoid. I was happy to talk to his friends and leave him to his little fantasy world. But he persisted with "Show me your camera, I'll tell you if it's good or not." I suggested to his friends that we all go back to mine, that there was Tequilaa and Absinthe there. "Where did you get the Absinthe? London? Oh that's shite Absinthe." "Well it's still free," I said. He wasn't having a bit of it, questioning my motivation for inviting them out, so Brian and I decided to go into town to Voodoo with them.

Why did you give them so much of your time, you may ask? Well we were going into town anyway and we were getting on with some of them, this guy was just so weird and paranoid and wouldn't leave me alone. We did have some fun with them; we were giving the girls piggybacks, a nice touch by Brian. Surprising how effective that one is!

Eventually Brian and I went down a laneway on Thomas Street for a quick Jiminy Jazz. When we returned the crew were nowhere to be seen. No problem, we thought if we catch up with them that's fine and if we've lost them what difference does it make? Next thing we walked by a doorway with the eight of them huddled together, their backs to us, hiding their faces. Well you can imagine the abuse we gave them. "Look at the state of yiz, hiding in a doorway. God sake, if you didn't want to hang around with us you could have said so. Well don't worry we don't want to hang around with the likes of you cowards." And Brian added "Thanks for coming." Nice one.

So after that misadventure we said "Right, we're going to have a blast tonight, where'll we go?" And where did we go? Copper Face Jacks, for our sins!

Everyone in Copper's was on a good buzz and I started telling them I was doing an article on Retro hair styling...




Waltzer Experience © 2000-2002 Alan Wall. All images are copyright and may not be used without permission.
Wage Slave © 2000-2002 Philip Barrett.