QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
Moose:
"I made the deadline but I didn't do the work."
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The Waltzer Experience is a weekly culture website which is edited and maintained by Alan Wall.
© 2000 Alan Wall
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Viv and Dermo Leave The House
The end of an era came about in the house on Friday when two of the biggest personalities left the house.
The Derm, a.k.a. Dermo, a.k.a. Derbhla, a.k.a. Cavan Man, was with us for almost a year, and in that time I have gained great respect for the man. Dermo is an inspiration when it comes to taking it easy and not over-doing it on the work front. Derm has given us and this web site a great deal of enjoyment and humor both through his own comments and antics, and our taking the piss of him, for want of a better expression. We'll miss The Derm, but there will always be a part of The Derm with us whenever the stress gets too much. Dermot is gong back to college to finish his degree. Respect.
And we are also losing our old school gangster rapper, Viv, a.k.a. Digo, a.k.a. The Juggler. Viv is part of the third generation crew, and has been with us for about two and a half years. Viv leaves us with no ring-leader, no one to make all the decisions, no one to advise us on the quality of the canteen food. What will we do without The Juggler? From being the undisputed top fake gangster, (the Waltzer coming in second for his claims of being a pimp), to providing some hilarious anecdotes (like the time he was fired from a job for hunting food with a spear), Viv has contributed greatly to the company on a personal level. And I am sure none of the managers/PLs/PMs would deny that he has contributed a lot professionally too. Viv leaves for Australia this week.
But definitely we will miss both of the lads and it is a damn shame that we couldn't keep the lads a bit longer, but like I always say, the time comes for everyone sooner or later.
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Our "Friend" Viv
By Joanne Rourke
Business skills hearts and minds were shocked to the core this week when it was revealed that designer Viv Duignan was set to join the cast of the popular American comedy Friends.
News of Viv's bid for stardom leaked out when photographs were discovered showing the Swords gangland leader practicing the brightest of cheesy smiles. "I thought Viv was just a sensitive misunderstood rebel without a cause", said brunette simulator Amanda, "I can't believe that he purposely deceived us about his reasons for leaving."
When angrily confronted by other designers in the house, Viv broke down and admitted that his reason for leaving were not because he was intending to emigrate to Oz, or because his parole officer said he could. It was in fact to pursue a career of bright smiles and bad jokes on hit comedy, Friends. "Anyway, I hinted to yiz ages ago - I told you my days being a pleb in the business house were numbered" he said referring to a quote previously reported on Walzer.net.
Studio sources have confirmed that the dark stubbled designer will enter the plot as Rachel's new boyfriend in a bizarre breakup with Ross and will soon become central to the programme when he poses a threat to Monica and Chandler's marriage by having an affair with both of them.
Studio bosses refused to comment on reports that Viv has requested $1 million dollars and a Britney Spears poster for each episode.
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New Web Restrictions
Waltzer questions the reasoning behind the latest web restrictions.
What is the story with the recent restrictions on web access in the house?
Are we really abusing the web? Is the work not being done? Are people downloading MP3s all day? Restricting across the board web access is a really bad buzz. I am very disappointed to see that a lot of web sites are restricted. Not only is it bad for morale, but the Business House writers need unlimited access for researching e-business, while the designers need to be able to access tutorials and examples of other design to keep their skills and aesthetic ability up to date.
But one of the reasons I am angry about the new restrictions is because I am afraid that they will eventually categorize this site, the Waltzer Experience, as restricted. If I let that happen, I will lose 49 percent of the visitors. That's a death knell for the site. So if that happens, I will first try to change it by seducing one of the girls in MIS. If that is unsuccessful, I will try to persuade the bosses that the site contributes greatly to morale in an unsettled group. If that doesn't work, we can petition the bosses to return access, and if that doesn't work, I will have to mirror the site on an eircom account or on scratch.
But hopefully it won't come to that. I haven't seen the girls in MIS yet, though...
Now that wrecks me buzz.
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